Little things …

My walk has been improving… it’s the little things. I can walk longer, stand up longer, and be balanced-doing all of this. Well, I can do those things for longer periods of time but it works because I am balanced better.  So, I guess, I should just say, I’m balanced better when I walk than I was last month.

It is a gradual thing. It is a very tiny bit everyday. Other people won’t notice it like the people I live with. People simply don’t notice the little things that have changed. Actually, my mother and sister notice changes before I do sometimes. That is how small the changes are. Again, improvements are happening, just not as fast and big you would expect.

I am able to swing my arms when I walk, which changes everything. I still have to hold on to someone when I am getting tired. I am able to walk and engage in the conversation that is occurring but only for a little bit.

I am happy I can do this… even if I can do it for a short bursts of time. It’s something to be proud of.

This is also why I get annoyed when people give me advice on how to function and push myself to do more. As if the little changes don’t matter. These little changes that you aren’t noticing took everything out of me to make it happen. Give me my credit, when it’s due.

I guess the point of this post was to let everyone know that things are changing for the better, even if they are little. It matters to me even if someone else doesn’t notice. It’s a slow process but it’s happening.

Oh! and I push myself to get better- more than you think. My mother and sister are, usually, the ones reeling me back in. So, I would appreciate everyone to stop telling me what to do, as if they have been in my situation before, and instead, start giving me suggestions. If doctors cannot give me a straight answer on how to do things, well, who are you?

I keep coming back to this in my entries: I am not pessimistic about all of this. This is how things are and there is no need to lie to myself about what really is going on.



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