Feelings, Today

Happy graduation day, Seda!


I am so proud of my baby cousin for what she has accomplished. I no longer hold the highest degree in the family. My reign ended this morning. It’s okay tho. I prefer it this way. 

This morning my cousin officially became an owner of a PhD. Pharmacist Seda. I like it. Congratulations! Today is a lovely day. 
At the moment, we are in upstate New York. I am tired. We were in the car around midnight. Drove all night. Well, I didn’t do the driving but I slept in the car. It wasn’t a great sleep by any means but better than nothing, I suppose. Nothing Starbucks can’t fix. I don’t know what is planned for the rest of the day after the ceremony but we’ll be busy with something. 

Right now, it is 10:10am. All I can think about is sleep and when I can get it. I’ll go back to last weeks post about ’13 Reasons Why’ and how I was able to relate to Hannah…

I’m here. I haven’t ever been suicidal or made attempts. Has it crossed my mind? Maybe. Out of anger. Out of spite. It was more of ‘what would they do?’ Not healthy. I’m aware. 

I can relate. Not in those terms above but when it comes to friends/family and how I feel I’m being treated by them. I haven’t been ostracized, slut shamed, or raped but I understood, I feel, the overall emotion the character was feeling. It’s not exact because no one can exactly feel what another is but you can get an idea based on your experience. 

Oh and spoiler alert, just in case. 

Hannah Baker was slut shamed by Jessica, her best friend. Before that, Jessica and Alex got together. They stopped hanging out or talking to Hannah, altogether. Hannah wasn’t invited or included in anything. When she did try to include the two of them it wasn’t welcoming. That I understood. 

Friends/people only think about their interests and what they want to do. They aren’t your baby sitters and you aren’t their main concern. She put others first because they were ‘friends.’ Hannah, to me, seemed like she was the character that put too much value on others; she trusted too many too quickly and got hurt when they didn’t reciprocate. They didn’t say or do anything to hurt Hannah on purpose or have the intent to but Hannah took it to heart. It’s just about a person caring way too much and everyone else being regular humans. 

Those that watched this show know that Hannah didn’t only kill herself because of what she explains in the tapes. There is more to what she blames others for. She is too sensitive for her own good. I dunno. I feel that I understood her sadness at times. Maybe nothing I said proves that I did get her. Maybe it’s just some projection going on. I dunno 😳

Feelings, Funsies, Today

13 Reasons Why

So this past week, I watched the Netflix show, 13 Reasons Why. 

I wanna start with schools and/or parents talking about how kids shouldn’t watch it. When it comes to the content they’re seeing, it isn’t quite appropriate. But as far as making suicide look good or what’s that word that has been used? I don’t remember it but it doesn’t do that. Suicide does not look good or appropriated. Either way, I don’t understand how this show makes suicide look good or look okay. 

I don’t understand why parents get all up in arms when they have to talk to their children about difficult topics. Talk to them. This show has a bit for everyone to take away from it. That includes the parents. Just because you’re good to your child doesn’t mean you know everything or that your child is okay. The point is, you shouldn’t ‘assume’ everything is okay with anyone. 

**Spoilers** warning for those who haven’t watched it and plan on watching it. 

This show gives you the opportunity to get  into the events and process an individual goes thru before committing to the act. 

Hannah felt shut out from friends. She felt left out, alienated. She felt alone. She wasn’t seen by others as a decent person. She was seen as a slut, easy, a drama queen, or just a overwhelming person overall. Not many liked her like she would have liked. She gave people chances even tho she knew better. She got raped when she least expected. She witnessed a friend get raped yet did nothing. Not doing anything would eat at anyone that isn’t a psychopath. There are people that have gone thru said things that haven’t killed themselves. I get that. That isn’t the point. 

The point is that any little moment can break someone. A situation that doesn’t break you might break me and vice versa. All stories are different. We understand things differently. With that, parents could use this show to open up the dialog between them and their children that they didn’t have before. Parents, be your child’s therapist. Listen to them without judgment. Let them come to you without judgment. Don’t assume that they’re okay because they haven’t come to you. They may never come to you. 

This show also shows the consequences that come with the tapes left by Hannah. One of the characters shot himself because of all that happened since the tapes came out. The way he was treated and the way others were being treated. Some process things differently. Another character has plans for the characters that made fun of him throughout the movie. 

I don’t know. There was a lot more going on in the movie aside from the suicide. There’s so much happening with each character. It’s more than Hannah. She was selfish in that she didn’t think about how everyone react or feel after listening to her tapes. There is so much to think about. This show didn’t glorify suicide. 

In fact, I believe it showed the viewer all the shit one is leaving behind for everyone else to clean up. Oh and if your child doesn’t see that, maybe they shouldn’t have watched the show at all.  That is all on you, parent. If your teenager doesn’t see that suicide isn’t the answer, you should change your relationship with said teenager and again, that’s on you, parent. 

I don’t see why anyone can’t watch it. The show does have graphic scenes and scenes that might be sensitive for some or be triggers for them. Idk if that’s even right; the way I’m explaining it. But you get it. Something can be learned by this show. It’s doing it’s job. It had everyone talking about suicide, rape, and bullying. That was the goal, right? 

I do, in the end, believe that everyone should watch it. I believe it was done well. At times I could relate to Hannah. Other times I couldn’t. But I can understand how or why she might feel what she feels. I can feel some of the characters sadness or frustration. Other characters I just couldn’t relate to at all. 

I can go on and on about this show. Maybe next week, I’ll talk about how I could relate at times to Hannah. Until then…